What Is Chastity and What is the Role of a Chastity Keyholder
Perhaps your partner brought up the idea of introducing a chastity device to your bedroom or your daily lives and you want to know what it’s all about. Maybe you simply are curious about chastity and what having a chastity keyholder is about. No matter what lead you here, you’re in the right place to learn more about chastity keyholding and begin a journey toward a new and interesting path of sexuality and kinky fetishes.
The basic idea behind the chastity kink is to fully induce the idea of control over the ability to become fully aroused and to reduce the ability to stimulate the genitals for pleasure at will. You can still enjoy teasing or being teased everywhere else on the body while wearing a chastity device, especially if you love denied or ruined orgasm play. Orgasms can be achieved occasionally, but will be quite disappointing compared to unfettered orgasms.
Chastity devices are designed in both male and female adaptations and all chastity devices are equipped with a locking mechanism of some sort. This lock and key feature is part of the physical and mental pleasure that is derived for both the caged and the keyholder. Strapped on chastity devices are available as well, but that’s not our focus today. So, let’s learn about the big ideas behind chastity keyholding.
Why Do I Need A Keyholder?
It can be easy to simply assume that the locked chastity devices are totally inescapable – simply not true in most cases. Sure, there are a few very difficult to escape devices, but overall, these are meant to be a mental play and not a form of any sort of (unwanted) abuse. If you’re concerned about cheating – chastity is not a great idea. If you love the idea of being caged, or having a fantastic psychologically based ‘power exchange’ dynamic in your sexual lifestyle – chastity and chastity keyholding is spot on!
Well, chastity involves locking devices around your genitals, and not all chastity wearers will want to have control over the lock – that’s sort of the point of it all. While all chastity wearers should have access to a key (for hygiene and safety reasons in general), the point of wearing a chastity device is to create a situation where you feel as if you have lost control over that particular part of your body. If you introduce a separate individual as a keyholder to your chastity situation, you will reinforce that idea exponentially. The psychological effects here can be really intense though, so weigh the decision very carefully when choosing a chastity keyholder or when introducing the idea of chastity keyholding to your partner. Some wearers might become resentful or some keyholders may become a bit too controlling – be sure to keep these behaviors in check and talk about your boundaries openly and honestly. There are certain responsibilities to having a keyholder or becoming a keyholder – so let’s take a look at the basics.
The act of keyholding is not to be taken lightly. When your friend or your lover has offered you the key to their chastity device, they are trusting you with control over the access to their own body.
First and foremost, keep track of the key you have been given control over. Just as any other key you own has great meaning to you, this key is of even greater importance. It has control over a person’s bodily functions. This particular key also can also be used to develop a stronger relationship with your partner as well as used as a teasing tool.
Also, as a chastity keyholder you might be expected to create rules for the chastity wearer. These rules should be discussed openly with the wearer – they need to agree to the rules before they can become rules of play that are actually acted out. As before, this is a sort of advanced mind game that simply decided to take things to the physical level. For everyone to get their rocks off, they have to be into the rules – mutually. If your wearer needs to (and wants to) learn how to go down on you better before being allowed to reach an orgasm, you can enforce this rule by agreeing to a certain number of oral orgasms they must make you achieve before having the device removed for their own pleasure. You can be as creative as you wish – so long as you both agree!
Finally, as a chastity keyholder, you may be expected to create and enforce a schedule of wear and even cleaning rituals – especially for long term wear in certain varieties of chastity devices. Not all chastity devices are equal when it comes to ease of cleaning, and occasional removal will be necessary. It will depend on your actual arrangements with your wearer, but you may need to supervise (and otherwise dedicate time and effort) to maximize the chastity experience during cleaning and any other periods of removal.
Chastity Wearer Responsibilities
As the chastity wearer, you will need to strongly consider your chastity keyholder as you will need to be very open and honest with them. It is also important to respect the keyholding agreement – because as we covered before, most devices are escapable (especially for men, thanks to the awesome flexibility the flaccid penis has). The whole point of the introduction of the chastity device is to heighten your sexuality and arousal – even if you can’t get all the way off unless unlocked.
Introducing Chastity And Keyholding Play To Your Lover
No matter the current dynamic, if one of you is interested in chastity play and ready to share it with your partner, remember that they may be new to the entire idea of it. Allow your partner time to research and become familiar with the feelings and ideas that chastity (and any other kink) provides them. You might be really familiar with any given kink, but that won’t mean that everyone has heard about it or that they will react the same way as others might have in the past. Through it all, remain open and honest, and remember that it doesn’t have to be a total lifestyle change – the limit is up to what you and your lover can agree upon. So keep it safe, sane, and consensual out there!